when the hell does ax morph a cow. what even...wait. is THIS the atlantis book? i feel like it was an ax one. 

why the hell a cow.

~~~

first use of the word "shorm"

i love that while saying tobias is his shorm he doesn't start with the fact that they both live in the woods and talk to each other at night when things seem hopeless.

nope.

he leads with "well TECHNICALLY tobias is an andalite so this isn't weird".

good ol' andalite arrogance. 

tho in all fairness he mentions the lonely meadow nights together.

```Humans who are young and restless are almost continuously in a state of attraction to others.``` comedy gold.

```“How about putting on a shirt?” Marco asked.
“The men who are young and restless do not wear shirts. I am young. And I am occasionally
restless.”
“Ax?”
“Yes, Marco?”
“Put on a shirt.”```

comedy.

gold.

```“Let him speak, Marco,” I said gravely, touching his arm. Jack, who is one of the youngest and
most restless, does this often, when he is trying to be understanding. Marco and Erek stared at me.```

gold.

```“Let me ask you this: How about if we just forget all about this and don’t tell Jake, and we all go
to the mall and see how many cinnamon buns Ax can eat before he explodes?”
“I have already performed that experiment,” I said.
Marco nodded. “Okay, then I guess we go tell Jake and the others and launch off into some dumb
mission that’ll end up with me screaming and running for my life. Sound good?”```

```<No,> I said. <If the Yeerks wished to kill a lot of humans they could simply use their Dracon
beams from orbit to ignite the atmosphere and incinerate all life on the planet.>```

that one stuck with me over the years too.

```Prince Jake sighed again and rubbed his eyes. “Okay look, let’s go get this over with fast or I’ll
end up spending the weekend doing a makeup paper, which would seriously stink.”
```

and this is why its a kids book and not a young adult.

```I was afraid of what I might find at the animal testing laboratory. Sometimes, when exposed to
what humans consider science, I inadvertently offend my friends. I am often tempted to explain human
errors.
```


```Marco kept grumbling about the online chat with the cast of The X-Files he was missing.
“Online” is a primitive human method of communicating in short, truncated, interrupted sentences
with anonymous individuals.
Humans have several means of communicating in uninterrupted form with known persons, but
many prefer “online.”
Like much of human technology, it is inexplicable.```

```<And we do not know …> I paused for a long moment, the way I had seen Victor Newman do.
Whenever he does this, the TV camera zooms in on his face. <… what kind of animals are being
tested in there.>```

the soap stuff is just extra funny to me cuz my mom was obsessed with this exact show. i didn't know you could just flat out reference real shows in fiction

i say  

doing just that  


but what i mean is, the author got PAID for it.

```A tunnel is an underground road. Humans build them to pass beneath rivers, or to pass beneath
roads or buildings whose presence evidently surprises them.
Planning ahead is not a great human virtue.```

sassy

~~~

```Even in the midst of a dangerous mission, I am aware of the fact that when I fly I feel even more free
than I do when running across an open meadow.```

really makes you think about how little freedom ax has on earth. how if he got seen it might mean his death and the death of all his friends. 

okay i have NO idea what possible plan could have tobias on top of a truck slowly morphing human.



oh.

even dumber than i thought.

``` Chimpanzees are a
species closely related to humans but slightly more attractive, and with a superior method of
locomotion that allows them to operate as two-footed or four-footed creatures.```

say waht you will ax, but so far every andalite we've met has fallen in love with an alien, its in all the memes


```Cassie is often the person most willing to examine
deeper philosophical issues.

<Cassie, I am concerned by this morph,> I said. <Is it sentient? Was it improper to acquire it?>
She said nothing. As though she had not heard me. Then she turned her dark chimpanzee eyes
toward me. <Could it have given permission, do you think? Is it capable?> she asked rhetorically```


we dont get enough cassie and ax
```Chimpanzees are proof of the unpredictability of evolution. Many humans think evolution
involves improvement. Of course, it does not. It merely involves survivability. Often individual
capabilities are lessened in the process of moving toward a survivable species. Humans are clearly
weaker than chimpanzees. But their brains are much more capable.
Well, somewhat more capable.
```

see thats something i think about a lot.

there a theory (don't remember where i heard it) that one of the reasons humans developeed intelligence is BECAUS how physically unimpresive we are.


that we needed social bonds and intelligence to overcome our frailties.

with that theory in mind, andalits never made sense to me. why are they a social species at all , 
why did they develop technology if they LITERALLY can watch their own back and kill anything that comes near

what do they gain from grouping up together?

what did technology buy them that their tails couldn't?

technology got us access to more and more consistent meat. helped us fight off predators. 

what did it do for andalites?

```I soon saw why humans prefer to draw an arbitrary line between themselves and other animals.
Had humans been used as these animals were used, the only appropriate descriptive word would
have been torture.
Torture.
Useful, no doubt. Medically justifiable, most likely. And it is not my business to judge humans.
But this behavior of theirs did trouble me.
After dark that night, I ran into the open fields to feed. The night was black. Even the lights from
the neighborhood where the others lived seemed dim. Earth’s single moon was only a sliver in the
sky. It was a visible difference between Earth and my home world. But I was finding that the
differences I could not see mattered much more.
Andalite creatures live in greater harmony than Earth animals. I thought of the kafit birds, the
hoobers, and the djabalas. We practiced morphing these creatures, but caging them, killing them,
eating them was unthinkable. We were creatures of the same world.
But as Marco, or perhaps Rachel, had once said: Earth is a tough neighborhood. The competition
for survival on Earth is brutal. This is a planet filled with powerful, violent predators. Predators
armed with huge teeth, impervious armour, claws that could open an Andalite’s body from end to end.
And yet it is Homo sapiens, with his weak jaw and purely symbolic claws, with his soft,
unarmoured flesh, who rules.

For millions of years we Andalites have not felt the pressure from other species. With our speed
and our tails we are without physical peers on our home world. It is different for humans. There are
parts of this planet where even today humans are prey to stronger animals.
```


i really do like that consistently we get the "humans live on a death world" trope.



```Humans dislike rain. I believe it is because it makes the ground slippery. When you are forever
teetering wildly on two legs, you resent anything that makes it more difficult to stand.```


i will never stop loving the fact that to andalties we have wildly impractical bodies



lol they even told us what the difference between steer and bull are

that tumblr animorph meme about circumsicion is suddenly relevant


oh man, they go from feeling nervous about morphing chimps without permission to... morphing these human controllers.

in for a penny, in for a pound.

oh wait, i see, they're just wearing their clothes. 

carry on then. 


```I have never seen driving like that! No wonder the driver took off. He must have been drunk.
He must be a lunatic!”
“Hey! Those are bulls!”
“Well, I’ll be a … transported like this? This really is nuts!”
The skinny man narrowed his eyes suspiciously. “Andalite bandits?”
The large man laughed. “I think an Andalite could figure out how to drive a truck. Besides, even
an Andalite isn’t stupid enough to morph a steer or even a bull and walk into a slaughterhouse. They’d
have to be idiots.”
<Could not have said it better myself,> Marco muttered.```


```It was a bewildering scene. A confusing assembly line, full of separate events and actions.
Cows are not highly intelligent animals. An intelligent animal, smelling the blood, catching this
brief glimpse of the future, would have bolted, kicked, fought.
But no, maybe that is not true, either. Maybe an intelligent animal would understand that it was
doomed and attempt to face the inevitable calmly.
In any event, neither Tobias nor I were cows. And neither of us was intellectually impaired.
<Forget this!> Tobias said.
<We must wait for the others to return,> I managed to say.
One noise was louder than the others. And getting nearer all the time. It was straight ahead. I
craned my neck. I was taller than the steer ahead of me.
I looked past him, and at first did not understand what I was seeing. The lead steer came up to a
place where pneumatic forces pushed the sides of the chute in, locking the animal in place.
A man, acting with practiced ease, whipped shackles around the back legs.
A second man held a large tool against the head of the steer. The tool had a cylinder on top.
He squeezed a trigger.
BANG!
The tool jerked. The steer fell. In its forehead was a hole.
Instantly it was jerked into the air by its legs.
I counted two more steer between me and the killing gun.
I have faced death in battle. But never as a dumb beast going to slaughter.
<I have changed my mind,> I said. <Let’s get out of here.>

```

reminds me of the slaughter house magnus archives pisode. 






```“Project Obedience is designed to use genetically engineered biological components to erase
those portions of the human brain responsible for free will.”
<Say what?> Marco said.
“Project Obedience has successfully tested Formula Seventy-one on chimpanzees, an Earth
species related to humans. One hundred percent success has been achieved, thanks to the genius of
Visser Three!”```


oh! i think i remember this one. they were lying to visser 3 cuz if they didn't theyd be killed. no such thin as project obedience exists

(cuz if it did, why would all those chimps have attacked visser3)

```<This is why we’re getting killed? Over this?> Cassie demanded.
<What, this isn’t serious enough for you?> Marco demanded angrily. <I mean, this could enslave
the entire human race within weeks!>
Cassie laughed, almost pityingly. <Oh, please. No way this works.>
<One hundred percent effective.> Prince Jake countered.
<It’s a lie,> Cassie said simply.
<You just don’t want to face reality,> Rachel said harshly. <I mean, come on! The Yeerks are far
more advanced than we are scientifically. They can do this!>
<No,> Cassie said firmly. <They can’t. Come on, we should unfreeze, or whatever, these people.
We have to free them.>
<You can’t free them,> Marco said. <Don’t you get it? They’ve already lost their free will! We
unfreeze them, they’ll do whatever the Yeerks order them to do. Turn on us! Attack us.>
<We are NOT leaving humans in cages,> Cassie said angrily.
<They’re not humans anymore,> Marco raged. <They might as well be Controllers. No free will.
Slaves!>
<Now, you listen to me,> Cassie said. <No one, nothing can eliminate free will. Don’t be
ridiculous. Even with a Yeerk in your head, you have free will. Not the will to do, but the will to
think, to believe, to hope or love or whatever.>
<This is worse than Yeerks, Cassie,> Prince Jake argued. <This goes deeper. One hundred
percent effective.>
<I do not wish to interrupt. This is a very interesting discussion,> I said. <However, one
question does occur to me.>
<What?> Rachel sighed.
<If these humans have no free will, why are they in cages? And, indeed, why are they being held
in bio-stasis?>```


yuuup

also, this really drivs home the wedge cassies defection brought to the team. rachel and march Just Do Not Trust her when the going gets tough. 

and marco flat out mocks her principals.

even jake doesn't agree with her at first. 


but yeah, this mission was about as pointless as the not!Area51 mission they had to discover an andalite toilet.

visser3 is just the worst boss, and if literlaly anyone else were in charge of this invasion we'd be doomed.

politics ftw

complete